They say marriage is about love, but I think it’s more than that. Marriage is a conscious choice that we make everyday to stick with a person through thick and thin. To know that there are some things in our lives that we will never see eye to eye, but that’s ok, because we respect our differences and know that marriage is bigger than one annoying issue
I always tell other people that I have no idea why Joyce married me, and I’m not kidding! Yes, there are (many times) where I feel like face palming myself looking at the things she is doing and saying, but most of the time, I am in awe of this person and have no idea how she do what she does. [Side note: One time, she asked me whether I can help her inflate the inflatable gym for our baby (that’s about half my height) with my mouth, it took me one hour to inflate that gym with a hand pump]
We’ve been married for 3 years now, and I don’t remember one morning that she didn’t wake up and give me a smile and a wave. I don’t know how she’s always happy, but I think that’s one of the best qualities in her. She’s always telling me that there’s no point being unhappy and the day still goes by even if you sulk……and I think she’s right. But even more important, she has never denied me the freedom of expressing my unhappiness and I really appreciate that
I’m not a very patient person. I get irritated whenever I am disrupted in the middle of doing something, or when another driver is hogging the lane. But Joyce is the total opposite of me, her standard response (when I’m about to step on the accelerator and flip the other guy off) is ‘It’s ok, it’s the other person’s ego speaking, just let them be, so long as we’re safe’
She’s consistent in the things she do. I’ve always been the type that likes to tinker in a lot of things and gets excited about a lot of ideas (including this blog). When I am immersed in something, I have the tendency to throw my life out of balance and forget about other things. But this woman, she is literally the most consistent person I have ever known. She’s consistent in doing the job that she loves (not everyday, sometimes her work is a bitch), she’s consistent in being a good wife, she’s consistent in keeping the house in order, she’s consistent in being happy, she’s consistent in being patient, and she’s consistent in being this version of herself. This always has been something (even before we were married) that I think I should learn from her
She’s dedicated. When we were dating, I got into a car accident and had to be in a wheelchair for 8 months, I had to close down my then business because of this and I lost everything but she stuck by my side. She didn’t say a lot of words of wisdom to me, she didn’t give me a big lecture about how this is just temporary and it will pass. She was just there. She was there during my surgery. She was there during my physiotherapy. She was there during my first outing after the accident. She was there during my first day back to work on a wheelchair. She was there when I started walking again. She just never left. It’s also the same when it comes to her family and friends. No matter how busy we are with things, her family and friends are always on her mind and she genuinely cares about their wellbeing.
Joyce is extremely supportive. Sometimes, some of the decisions that I make is at the possible detriment of our family, both in terms of time spent and financially. But she has never complained and looked at the downside of things. I remember discussing with her about the risks to our family before getting involved in this travel agency business, and her response was ‘I think this is a good step for us, I know you want to do it and I think you should, if it’s not now then when?’ *Mind blown*
She’s my best friend – she knows me better than I know myself. I have never had to try to show the best side of me in front of her. I can just be the cunt that I am (kidding, I just thought it was funny to write this sentence). I can just be the person that I am. Sometimes your best friend teaches you things that you don’t know about yourself and makes you want to be better, both as a person and with the things you do in life.
This might be the corniest sentence in my postings so far. But I am lucky to have Joyce in my life, and I hope she feels the same too
I won’t be asking for any thoughts in this post because this are the facts of my life. It’s the only way I feel about my wife, and you can suck it if you disagree.